Online gems

Every day, millions of professionally- and self-published items hit the internet and today I stumbled across two...

The first is from my old hometown's newspaper...

A 34-year-old Austin man was arrested Sunday for allegedly attacking another man with a chair leg.

The second one comes from a Craigslist ad...
sew my stupid ugly clothes back together (minneapolis, uptown)
i wear a lot of stupid ugly clothes. i am very particular about the stupid way that i dress, so when something like a pair of pants has a hole in the crotch, i am devastated. that being said, i am pretty devastated over a few pairs of pants. usually i have my mom sew them, but she lives out in bloomington and honestly, i feel she half-asses the job because she thinks i dress like her father did in the 1970s. she has a track record of (possibly intentionally) ruining my clothes, but i like to assume it is an accident because i dont like imagining that my mom is capable of being all cunning and mean.

i also have a shirt that needs a bit of alteration and a pair of pants that could use some shortening for my gnome-like legs.

if you can aid in this task, i will pay you money or take you to a local Chuck E. Cheese where you can play skee-ball while i cry about my childhood. you don't even have to do that good job a job - just make sure they stay together.

sincerely yours,
crotchhole jackson

Location: minneapolis, uptown
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Compensation: tell me how much you want and i'll tell you how much i want to give you. we will work out a number using a sophisticated spreadsheet my roommate can design because he's a dork.

Even more gems reside at MinnPics. I am sure something good was photographed this past cool weekend and I'll share it with you today!

Thank You Craigslist

It's amazing what you can find on Craigslist - especially when you're not really looking for it.

After a family thing yesterday, I was amazed at how much the baby liked her cousin's swing. She seemed almost angry when we plucked her out of it. It made me realize that I'm going to need a backyard swing sooner rather than later.

That is where the Craigslist search came in. A simple search for "swing" in the for sale items brought up 1,000 items. But it was this one that jumped out at me.

Original Love/sex Swing

4 legs. Stands about 6.5ft tall.

Comfortably holds 200lbs.

Paint chipping from legs, only cosmetic. does not come in original package.

Cash only, pickup only. Maplewood by lower afton and mcknight.

Will delete posting when item gone.

I don't care how thrifty a person is, it takes a different type of person to buy someone's used sex swing. That's like picking up a used vibrator at a garage sale. It's a line that shouldn't be crossed.

MinnPics is devoid of most things odd and sexual and has big things planned during it's first birthday week beginning July 6th.